Pregnancy Complaints #349

This last part of pregnancy has been tough. I don't even feel like blogging or talking on the phone. The physical pains already described here in this space haven't diminished -- some more have crept in. Serious insomnia even with taking Benedryl every night (although I'm getting lots of reading in). I've also been struggling with intense mood swings (they don't swing all that positive, though) and depression. Dave and all my friends and my midwife have all been working hard to keep me on an even keel, but I'm still fairly tossed by the waves of what's going on inside of me.

Dave and I had a long talk today (after our fight last night- we didn't throw anything at each other, it just felt horrible) and I thought from last night that he didn't want to be my friend any more. It was a terribly painful realization last night. Today, I told him how desperately I've needed him and no matter how much I didn't want to be so needy right now, I just am. He said that each pregnancy takes HIS best friend away from him and that he knows this is hard on me, but it's hard on him, too. I told him that I missed me too and I can hardly wait to get back the person I used to be. We agreed it's just hard all around. He understood me. Then, after making sure the kids were packed and shipping them off to his mom's, he took me out for dinner. My painful realization last night was a misunderstanding perpetrated by both of us struggling to keep up with this. Life is hard, but God is good. (terrific Pam Thum song)

Getting to know you

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? A drug addict adulterous mistress who had breast cancer and committed suicide in a movie my mom saw called "Valley of the Dolls." I've never had the desire to watch the show and isn't quite what I would choose for my children.
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? yesterday. Pregnancy hormones are doing a number on my emotions this last month.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING yes - It's neater now than when I was in school. Since I starting homeschooling and knew I'd be an example to my children, I polished it up.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? ham (when it's with swiss & miracle whip)
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? I'm working on our 5th
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Yes, but not too good a friend. I don't think I'm as good a friend as my friends are to me.
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM ALOT? honesty is more biting, so I don't feel a need for it.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS yes, with the exception of a finger tip that needed sewed on when I worked at Arby's (for a short time), I've never needed surgery.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? I would be seriously tempted...but when I went white water rafting and ended up under the boat 2 times, I promised God that I wouldn't needlessly risk my life anymore.
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? captain crunch
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? No, but my shoes are rarely on.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? I am, but only by the grace of God.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Atz Chocolate Chip Mint
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Their overall appearance and how they carry themselves.
15. RED OR PINK? neither
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? my mouth gets me in the most trouble.
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? my Grandma Handlin
18. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? none for either. I walk around the house in a big t-shirt when I'm pregnant. (Aren't you glad you don't live in my house and are subjected to such a sight?)
19. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE shredded wheat cereal
20. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? the kids fighting, whistling, asking questions of each other, cabinets closing as the whistling one is emptying the dishwasher, the dogs nails clicking on the ceramic tile as she paces from kid to kid hoping to be fed (since they're in the kitchen)...the general clamour of our day
21. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? normally, I'd be a pale blue aqua, but I'm a little off right now, so I'm a seafoam green that's a little too bright - life is taking more effort and I'm forcing myself to exert the energy to keep up.
22. FAVORITE SMELLS? Brewing coffee, baking cookies, pumpkin spices, lemon-scented cleaner, a slight smell of bleach
23. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? my neighbor, Katie, who wanted to make sure I was doing OK
24. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Diane has one of the most ougoing fun personalities of anyone I know -- OF COURSE I like her!!
25. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? there's not a single one
26. HAIR COLOR? dark brown
27. EYE COLOR? dark brown
28. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? I have a hard enough time just keeping track of my glasses, let alone a tiny see-through disc. And I just can't bear the thought of sticking stuff in my eyes all the time...nope.
29. FAVORITE FOOD? the reality is NOTHING sounds good lately. I guess non-pregnant would be homemade german chocolate cake heated with Breyer's vanilla ice cream on the side.
30. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? definately happy endings, no contest
31. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? The last memorable one was The Pursuit of Happyness
32. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? denim
33. SUMMER OR WINTER? I honestly like them both (and have things I don't like about each). 34. HUGS OR KISSES? hugs, but I'm not even too keen on those (I don't like being touched, much).
35. FAVORITE DESSERT? I already described one, so these are my runners-up ...

Mrs. Smith's Razzleberry pie (I love raspberries) heated with vanilla icecream
Pumpkin pie with whipped topping (I can only eat small amounts of this, but love it)
Brownie topped with vanilla icecream & a little fudge with a lot of toasted pecans

36. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? I'm finishing up a book about President Bush's first term in office and media bias against him and I'm about to start Helena by Evelyn Waugh for a book group I'm in.
WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? We don't have one. The kids lost it, so we're just scratching up the pull-out keyboard drawer of our desk.
37. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? A Heroes episode I taped
38. FAVORITE SOUND? Silence -- ohhh yeah!! (and church bells - which signify quiet to come)
39. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? neither -- I guess of old music I like Electric Light Orchestra and ... ummm... Steve Miller Band (don't let my kids listen to that music, though).
40. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Scotland
41. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? I like to throw parties...I don't know that it's a talent, though.
42. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? in town

My Cookware Set

This is another e-mail discussion I'm having with friends about what cookware we use and what we think of it. This is my response :


I use Analon Titanium and LOVE it. I've only had the set for 3-4 years.

POSITIVES
+ In learning to cook (and not minding their mama), the kids have cut through the non-stick coating by using metal utensils, but nothing has started to stick, yet. + Even in frying refried beans in the 14" skillet for 3 hours (where the water boils out and you replenish it) and burning them terribly and leaving the pan overnight (something I do often), NOTHING has ever stuck.
+ Other 12-14" skillets I've had didn't distribute the heat as well and food didn't seem to cook as evenly as it does in these pans.
+ The bottom is smooth (one of the brands has ridges in the bottom) and so there isn't a problem with thing sticking.
+ You're supposed to be able to put it in the dishwasher if you use liquid detergent. I use powder, so I've rarely tried this, but thought it was cool!

NEGATIVES
- It does have smooth rivets that hold the handles on, and occasionally, I'll have to use my Pampered Chef scraper to get dried egg off the rivets (the kids go a little crazy when they scramble), but it comes off easily and quickly.
- The other negative may be that the heat-resistant handles get hot when placed over another burner that's turned on. It doesn't happen quickly, though, and it wouldn't occur to me to pick up a pan without testing the handles first (it has occured to the kids who forget to use a hot pad).
- It's also SERIOUSLY pricey -- but I'm so thrilled with the way it cooks and how nice it's stayed even though I stack it all together in my cabinets, that it was worth the price for me.

http://www.amazon.com/Anolon-Titanium-Dishwasher-12-Piece-Cookware/dp/B00008CM50 - this set doesn't contain the 14" skillet (which is one of my most-used pans in the house). Amazon customers gave it GREAT reviews, too!

http://www.epinions.com/hmgd-Cookware-All-Cookware_Sets-Hard_Anodized_Aluminum - this is the website I used to compare reviews of cookware set. I read most of the reviews of the major cookware sets and chose Analon Titanium from that.

The Blessing of Animals

I tried to talk Dave out of it. I tried to talk the kids out of it. I thought he was crazy. I knew I'd never do anything so insane (mostly). At church for the Feast of St. Francis, they had the Blessing of Animals. It sounds sweet doesn't it? Kids bringing their puppies to get a blessing.

Unless you have multiple children (which he does) and are planning on taking a dog that's afraid (therefore freaks out) with other animals - especially dogs. This is not some tiny lap dog. Maggie growls & goes crazy at the sight of other dogs 30 feet away through a pane of glass (which she broke last year trying to go through the window to get to the dog 30 feet away). This is a full-grown black lab who is incredibly strong and can take any of the kids and I on a ride if she decides to run and we hold onto her leash. This dog can't be walked because she won't mind (she doesn't heel, or stay...) She's super sweet in the house and adores all humans -- just not other dogs.

So, he took all 4 kids. A dog who will be 2 feet from other dogs. And a blind hamster to get blessed. I'm totally thinking it isn't worth it and stayed home in my recliner and sent Dd#2 with the digital camera. This is a picture of DS#3 with the blind hamster, Eaty, in a rubbermaid container after it's been sprinkled with holy water. Dave said he had a hard time keeping DS#3 from jumping off the half wall while he held the hamster container -- he knew that our son would hit the ground with the poor hamster still in mid-air in it's container. Eaty appears to have survived the ordeal.

I guess Dave had a hard time restraining Maggie and said it's nothing I should try. The kids told me that everytime a dog barked or howled, Maggie joined in. It was incredibly sweet of him to try. He said Ds#3 appreciated it the most, since Eaty is his miracle pet.

Just Say Yes

I read an article about a homeschool mom looking back at the end of her journey. It was about things she'd done right and things she'd wished she'd learned earlier along the way. This piece of advice struck me. I think it's a small thing that I can do to be more positive :

Just Say Yes.We seem to have bought into the "Just Say No" mentality: No, you may not have dessert because you didn't eat your supper. No, you may not play with your friend because you didn't finish your chores. I realized that I could turn those no's into yes's and turn the responsibility into a positive thing for my kids. Yes, you may have dessert as soon as you finish your healthy food. Yes, you may play with her after you finish your morning jobs. I was not "The Bad Guy" anymore. After all, I was giving them permission to do what they had asked (if it was truly an acceptable option). The responsibility was now in their laps. If they did not get dessert, whose choice had that been? And whose "fault" was it now if they didn't finish their chores and get to play? Aha! The concept of personal responsibility!

Quote of the Day

A few times a day I allow a child to sit next to me (to read a book to me, etc.), but I'm so uncomfortable and if they move slightly, I'm really uncomfortable. I continually tell them not to wiggle.
Ds#4

Mama, I don't like you being pregnant...I miss your
lap.

I've been tagged

By Amy to list 7 random things about myself (I'd better double check my punctuation*/:)'% before Amy reads this.

1. When I was in 5th grade I let the boys in school talk me into breathing in and out really fast and one of them grabbed me from behind and squeezed my stomach and made me pass out. We got in so much trouble with the nuns that even though I though it was really cool, I never tried it again.
2. I don't like pink or clothes with bows on it -- even on my babies.
3. I'm like Jesus, I've never broken a bone.
4. I was quiet and almost shy as a kid (isn't that ironic!) (or is ironic)! Punctuation around parenthesis always confuses me.
5. I've always been proud of my freckles (my dad told me they were cute when I was little).
6. I don't have any stretch marks on my stomach (I even amazed my midwife with this one) -- do you think I'm jinxing myself by saying that before the pregnancy is over?
7. I met Jesus (as my best friend) in the 4th grade during Confession through the leading of an old priest. I'm so thankful for that priest who took me on his lap while I was crying during confession and led me to Christ!